Obsession

• She won’t eat the really good for you, Wysong lamb and rice. She wants the cheap and sleazy seafood feast.

• I am not ready to give it up completely, not when pot after pot of fresh brewed keeps wafting past my nose.

• I smoked only 12 cigarettes yesterday. I also slept close to 12 hours.

• I somehow remembered how to make bullitts from somewhere so deep down in my memory that I shocked myself.

• I just really like Will Smiths music. And he seems like such a nice man.

• I’ve been suffering from a lack of peanut butter. Yesterday I had toast-n-honey instead and realized that that is a fairly ancient food.

• I have a mental picture going, of one xmas around 1969 when Mr. Science unwrapped the coveted Glen Campbell album. I think it was the Lineman For The County one. The one with his head against a blue background.

• Can you tell I’m trying to distract myself from wanting a smoke? I feel like Mrs. Lafayette Du Bois, don’t fucking touch my camellias though.

• The (famous & coveted) meatballs are made, the shrimp will be made tomorrow, (ya gotta make it fresh in the AM) and I’m going to attempt the amazing sour cream, streusel pistachio cake for Sunday. I think I’m going to have to give it the Stella touch though. I really think nutmeg and orange (or lemon) needs to be added to the streusel, just cinnamon is boring.

• There has been some definite reflection happening on family dynamics and this, the big bugaboo holiday. Every year I say I’m not doing it again, every year I go back. I keep telling myself it’s only a couple hours....

• OK that does it, I’m smoking now.