Blog-o-phobia

I don’t exactly know what’s going on here but suddenly the blog has come to represent - something else, something problematic. Allen Ginsburg said that “things are symbols of themselves”. Maybe I’m just not getting that on the “meta” level, but for me things are usually symbols of something else altogether. The result being that I constantly am doing the psychic gymnastics of robbing Peter to pay Paul in the act of balancing what gets done and what hangs fire.

Any piece of paperwork or act of responsibility becomes a tower of outcomes, relationships, and probably most damaging of all, power dynamics. Scaling those towers or bringing them into any kind of proper perspective is intensely fraught with - “stuff”.
Here are things that end up on the view side of the electron microscope of my neurosis's:
The phone
The mail
College paperwork
Assignments
Work paperwork
Taxes
The bills
Changing services, starting new services
Cleaning
Dharma
Writing

There’s probably more but those are the completely blatant examples. For me, no cigar has ever been just a cigar, if you know what I mean. The power dynamic and who has it runs me, a lot. I wonder whether this is generally a womens issue or whether men have it as well since the power trip really does affect all of us peons?