Finally Pah*

As far as I am concerned, today is it, the first day of spring. This is my method of getting through Michigan winter w/out sticking a fork in my forehead and to keep passing the (at this time of year, in this location, closed, but could be, opened) windows.

See, I judge that November is not really too bad. Maybe a little snow, grey, but not too cold, and most importantly, psychologically manageable if you stay in the moment and don’t start projecting out over the long, dread, expanse ahead.
So winter really starts on Dec. 1st. Now, I realize I could try to fool myself with the whole solstice = late December part. Thereby giving myself an extra 20 or so days before panicking. But I am just not that gullible. As Hitchcock says (R. not A.) “It’s the darkest time of year”. Add the next 20 days coming out and that is a fairly biblical feeling, 40 days of darkness. Then late January and February are just ass bite cold. I don’t care at that point whether it’s getting lighter. I am just not going out in it if I don’t absolutely have to. Fuck all you cheery sledders, skiers and skaters. You’re just whistling in the dark. And we all know that all that really does is make you a target.

So basically I view winter as a 90 day stint. December, January and February. And as my old hard-core, felonious, braggart, friends used to say, “I can do 90 days standing on my head”.
Well I can. Except for the, my skin drying up and turning into dust part. Or the 9 day cold I just got over. With the residual perpetual sore throat. Or the voracious, I apparently now live in the produce section of Busch's, filling and munching through my fruit basket over and over. The other day I craved greens so badly. I almost peed myself when they had beets with greens intact. I rushed home and resurrected the wilting kale in the rotter drawer and made up a big ol’ pot of sweet and sour greens, all tender and Xmas coloured, with shallots, Chinese vinegar, agave nectar, salt and fresh ground pepper, and both bacon and prosciutto. Oh man. Just thinking about it makes me need to go find the leftovers right now.

* The ASL sign for finally - Both hands in pointer finger shape. Starting at both sides of the mouth draw a C shape up and out to the sides while saying “pah”.