Think I'll be a Jr. Frogman

I really must get this school thing together but, there are so many issues at work here.
I had come to a bit of an epiphany. By going on hunches and doing things without knowing why I have set up a good plan and base for my first career.
I continued studying ASL even though my Dad bailed on me, and I just learned the other day that indeed if I become a therapist specializing in in addiction and abuse, if I speak ASL, I will likely be able to find work easily.
I can have my own practice and work part-time for an agency. Sounds good.
However the idea of succeeding in school is so very intimidating that the act of even applying is tainted through and through. I am essentially paralyzed.
I had thought by taking classes and succeeding for the past 3 or 4 years I had broken the pattern and overcome the bug-a-boo.
Wrong. No matter how much I called taking classes school, something in my psyche knew it was classes. Now that I’m facing real school all the old shit has come flying out and is swirling like some ghost ridden miasma over my head, freezing my bones and brain.